Numb

It couldn't have come at a worse time in the flow of this life. The foretelling was happening all yer and now, no income. Thank goodness I have a roommate, though she doesn't pay half the bills most of the time, so financial concerns are high. Savings will keep us afloat a while. The apathy undermining this year (as exhibited by the increasing and constant physical bloat) has lead to frustrations and an unsettled (and repressed) me. Very awkward and unfamiliar territory. Hopefully things will change inside and stop the crawl toward oblivion. Wondering if anyone really cares is getting way too real and influential, cuz after all, it really doesn't matter if anyone else cares, what matters is how much I care about me.

Less than usual, alas.