early too be late

it is early in the evening to be feeling so alone when there are so many people awake out there partying and looking for love and whatever, but i am working on the living space this weekend because i haven't done laundry in weeks cuz jackson was packing for her move and cuz she ran out of time for packing and ran out of space in her car, her stuff is everywhere and it's gonna take a while to straighten the place out so i'm all alone this weekend working on the place... jackson is out of contact on a camping trip so i'm on my own in this project of cleaning up her stuff so it's lonelier than it would have been if she was in touch... but this is the afterblog, after all, where no one stays awake with me, where alone is all i've ever known...

yes, feeling alone... and lonely...

but then, fact is, i'm just as alone in all my other writing spaces... pretending people care and are reading the other blogs is just hopeful wishing most of the time... awe, don't blow the illusion, right?... someone cares, someone loves me, right?... right?... right?...

and with a sigh and a smile, i continue...